Chapter 2

So chapter 1 of our life in a triad has come to an inevitable end. There were exhilarating moments, passionate sex, great food, fabulous museums and exposure to thoughts and ideas. But distance and closeness both have an edge that can be equally as sharp and ultimately can create challenges. More powerfully are the disparate goals and philosophies that make you incompatible. Once exposed, they produce irreparable fissures that time simply can’t close. It doesn’t mean you don’t love or care for others in the relationship but it does mean it’s time to move on. We will always have fond memories and will hold onto them forever. We will never look at the city the same, never go by the places we frequented together without saying, “do you remember when…”

We learned the value of honesty, the damage of untruths, and the richness of the passion of ideas. We also felt the powerful lessons of managing complex relationships, more complex than the average person endures. We took notes, discussed privately sometimes, with all three at other times, what we liked and disliked in the triad relationship. We don’t look at the experience as bad but rather well within the parameters of the cliche, “better to have loved…”.  Oddly enough, as I typed “loved” it came out “lived” which is what we truly did the past six months. 
We also came to realize that people don’t have baggage but rather stories and history. They’re not damaged only different. You see each person for what they are and you learn to accept the things that make them who they are. It’s truly what made the past six months so much fun and so memorable. 

This relationship was intensely sexual but equally intensely intellectual. It was genuine friendship and exploration. We found our way, briefly, as a triad and it was fulfilling and wonderful. 

Orgasms. Times Three. 

I’m writing a very brief update to our blog. 

We’re getting custom made vampire fangs made for a party the end of this month. But last night was the coup de grace of sexual pleasure. 

After a wonderful evening at Radio City, we did dinner then back to her place for an evening of sex. As she rode his cock from on top, I straddled his mouth, taking every bit of sexual pleasure I could. As I leaned back into her, she cupped my breasts and kissed my neck. I then heard a deep, guttural growl as he began to explode inside her, causing her to reach orgasm and then causing me to reach climax 

I’ll write more later…

Missing Our Partner

I write extensively about our relationship and the details of our sexuality. 

This post is about missing her. 

We miss her. Immensely. We’ve connected. We’re happy.  We crave her company and the intellectual stimulation that comes with it. We find our passion grows deeper with each day. She is away for the next week and for the first time in our triad we are all scattered across the United States. It’s makes the anticipation for our next time together even more unbearable but simultaneously more exciting. We communicate as a triad through texts during the day but also have our individual communication with one another. It makes the passing of time between our long weekends bearable but less than enjoyable. How can two women have serious feelings for one man and yet not feel the jealousy that most people would feel? This is what makes this so erotic and stimulating. Part of it are the looks we receive at parties and dinner and brunch. But so much of this is about the continual transition from sexual partners to lovers to friends. We do count the days between our time with her and know she does the same. Sometimes our texts are raunchy and well beyond suggestive. Other times they’re deep and pensive and insightful. Regardless, we ache between our days with N. 

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Latex

So often we’ll get responses to advertisements or our FetLife (www.fetlife.com) profile that wonder if what is depicted is really us.

Unequivocally, yes.

We update our pictures, video and blog so often that it should give everyone a high level of confidence that we are who we say we are and that we do what we say we do.

IMG_2066We do keep our identity hidden online, we do have lives apart from our fetishes.  But part of the joy of this lifestyle is telling everyone what we do,IMG_2044 letting them know that we’re real people that have the same desires, goals and challenges in life and that sexuality is a wonderful thing, especially between a committed, married couple.  Frankly, we believe that we’re the best therapy for the couple that needs help because our lifestyle unleashes the passions and desires, both physical and emotional, that keep relationships strong.

We’re also asked, how often do you have vanilla sex versus fetish or bdsm sex.  Much depends on what’s going on in our lives but if we’re shooting video, we’ll have non-vanilla sex several times a week but even our vanilla sex tends to lean towards fetish sex.  IMG_2356We’ll wear leather to bed, sleep in it, hold each other

Snapshot 1 (7-6-2014 9-27 PM)

down, wrestle, talk dirty and do many other things that most people would deem as D/s and not vanilla.  Regardless, we love having sex and as a couple in our 50s, that’s a rarity.

0193200-R1-E027Our desire is to continue this lifestyle until we’re physically unable to do so any more.  Staying in shape, exercising, and being open 0181700_0181700-R1-E025minded about sexuality, whether you’re 25, 50 or 75 years old is the key.  Being unafraid to indulge in somewhat hedonistic pursuits with one another and unashamed of sex regardless of age makes this a journey so worth having.

We will continue to post true depictions of our sexual interaction, stories about encounters with others in this lifestyle and events in general about

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our lives.  We hope that you’ll always find this interesting and we would love to know what people want to know about us.

Religious play can be very taboo, even among the most open minded bdsm, D/s and fetish couples.  What level are you willing to go, what are you willing to desecrate and how deep are your beliefs in the afterlife or even retribution here on earth.

We tend to lean toward the side that  God has humor and isn’t concerned with our use of religious symbolism or a rubber nun’s outfit to create a sexually charged environment.  How far we go is a challenge, even for us.

We own a Jesus crucifix dildo which, from an imagery perspective, is about as wicked as it gets.  We certainly hope that Jesus isn’t too pissed off.  As for desecrating a religious text, we’ve never really done that, only talked about it.  We’ve used Bibles in photography, but only with a naughty nun holding it.  We will admit that we steer away from Islamic imagery because of the potential responses that may be triggered.  But rosary beads, crucifixes, chalices and Bibles all seem fair game.

We’d also like to try doing a session in a cemetery but the obvious complications make it nearly impossible.  But down deep inside, there’s a desire to use a large crucifix headstone as the tie down point for a flogging.  And if there was a way to get away with it, using the altar in a church could prove to be the ultimate in sacrilege.

We’d love to know other opinions on religious play and how far you’re willing to go in using religious symbolism in fetish or bdsm play.

Over the years, we’ve seen numerous clients who vary in experience, desire and ability. Some correspondence this morning with a Craigslist respondent made us want to write a bit about these people. 

What’s fascinating is that the vast majority of clients do not fit any stereotypical mold. They’re businessmen, lawyers, contractors, mechanics and sometimes students.  The most intriguing are the ones who possess fetishes that are so far removed from their personas that you would never suspect their desires. 

We’ll highlight one. 

He is a business owner, younger than the average submissive, loves very physical play, travels extensively, loves cross dressing and has a intellect that’s sharper than anyone’s.  What’s even more intriguing is his “split personality” when playing during a session. He has two distinct characters that he divulges depending on how we are playing with him. One is sweet and submissive, the other saucy and nasty. Both are loads of fun but the nasty girl is the one that brings out the aggressive play in us. 

Our enjoyment comes from knowing and understanding each of the submissives desires, fantasies and fetishes. Bringing out these aspects, sometimes unknown to the submissive is what’s most enjoyable about this lifestyle. 

-The MindFucks