To date, our triad relationships have almost always invoked the three of us except for a couple times where we agreed my husband would see the female apart from our normal visit. At no time did I spend time alone with the female. 

That changed. 

My husband was out of town on business and our newest girl and I decided to build his anticipation and excitement for getting home. She came over to the house late one morning after we had a workout together and seduced me into seducing her. 

I love using a strap on and I used my favorite black one. The harness fits in such a way that wearing it with a dildo provides me immense stimulation. But prior to penetrating her, I pushed her onto the bed, directed her to spread her legs and I went down on her, putting two fingers in her, slamming her pussy hard and simultaneously licking her clit. I brought her to climax multiple times, felt my aggression build, climbing on her and forcing my cock inside of her. As I built on my thrusts she lifted her back off the bed and and I pounded her over and over. Slamming her repeatedly, the headboard of my bed banged into the wall and her screams were highly audible and will probably once again draw the wrath of our neighbors much like the last time. 

Our session was somewhat abbreviated but nonetheless erotic and sensual. We made a short video and sent it to our man, getting the response we hoped for.  After a week on the road, he was certainly ready for a night with us. 

Submissive “G” continues to be my top submissive, not because of what he does for me but because he’s growing as a person, both professionally and personally. 

“G” is managing a large project, one that he may not have had the confidence to tackle a year ago. His service to me is as much about his growth as it is making my life better. He’s done both splendidly. Watching him tackle this project and handle his associates and business partners with confidence thrills me beyond belief. He has been a wonderful project to take on and he has not let me down. He is calm and self assured and that’s what pleases me the most. I’ve worked hard to get him to this point and I see such potential ahead for him. He’s truly made himself my best submissive and I’ll cherish that forever. 

It’s been too long since I’ve put something in writing about my personal relationships and I think I may wait a little while before I do so. I’d like to determine the trajectory of some of my relationships before I finally put their resolution in writing.

Professionally, however, my clientele continues to grow and that expansion brings with it a wonderful new set of personalities and stories. My latest client is “H”, an older and incredibly articulate submissive who suffers from erectile dysfunction. He paid for a 30 minute video session but I gave more time because he was so inquisitive and interesting. I love when a submissive takes a genuine interest in me because I always have a genuine interest in them. “H” was curious about my orgasms, about what pleased me, about what I felt when having sex. He reminded me of a doctor with a fabulous bedside manner who would take the time to ask about your symptoms in order to better diagnose the problem. “H” and I talked for 45 minutes and yes, he wanted to get off so there absolutely was an ulterior motive, but his interest was genuine and the admiration of his Goddess quite real. 

I got to the end of the session, left him with a little extra something to imagine and fantasize over and went on my way. I do so hope to see him again!!

Over the past several months I encountered submissives who believe that the dominant/submissive role is a one-way street, that is, I am to provide a service to them but they do not provide anything in return. This could not be further from the truth or my expectations.

Yes, I understand that you pay for a session or two, however, what you pay for is the privilege of serving me. So in essence, what you are doing, is providing me with pleasure that is more important than your own.

I have several submissive’s who make the claim that their sole desire in our relationship is to make my life as carefree and luxurious as possible, however, when pressed to do so, they take it as a personal affront and usually back off or shy away. When confronted about their stated desires versus their actions, they provide a myriad of excuses why they can’t, but not a single reason why they can.   I would rather have a submissive be honest and say that he is not in a position to make my life as comfortable as I would like. I can handle that. But to make the continual promises with no follow through means that the submissive is only doing this for his pleasure and not for mine.

The value and beauty of submission in this relationship is that the submissive puts me first and derives his pleasure from that dynamic. If he chooses not to do that, then he is not truly a submissive but merely someone who wishes to have an hour or two for his pleasure, with no regard for mine.  In that case, is he truly a submissive? I do not think so.

Submissive’s continually come to me with ulterior motive’s and no desire to share what those motives are. I would much rather have one say, “I seek humiliation purely for my own pleasure” than to say, “I will do anything to please you and make your life better” and not do so.

I will admit there’s a fine line between the dynamic of a paying submissive and a paying submissive who wishes to indulge my pleasure.  But as I continue to develop and evolve as a dominatrix, I find that the only submissives I’m truly interested in are those who have a genuine interest in my pleasure first.

“Why do you like the feeling of ownership” I asked my girlfriend.  Her response was spot on.

“That’s a great question.  For me, it’s just relief.  I feel like I’m forced into positions of responsibility all day long, so it’s this great relief to have someone else in control.  Someone whom I trust to be as intelligent as myself (which isn’t often).  My exporation into this is feminist in itself though, the fact I did this independently.  Also, I think you can philosophically argue that the most powerful person in any dynamic is the sub.  The sub consents and can stop things at any time.  The dominant is beholden to the sub in that sense.”

As much as the 50 Shades of Grey series cheapens the dominant/submissive dynamic, one of the central themes of the series was that the submissive actually holds the control and power in this dynamic.

“I think that’s what is interesting about the sub/Dom relationship”, she said.  “The complexity, nuances and yes, 50 Shades.  It’s a mirror of every other relationship, except it’s so literal so it’s easier to analyze.”

I think this summarizes so succinctly and beautifully the relationship between dominant and submissive.  It distills the thoughts of so many who have more than just a passing curiosity in this lifestyle.

Missing Our Partner

I write extensively about our relationship and the details of our sexuality. 

This post is about missing her. 

We miss her. Immensely. We’ve connected. We’re happy.  We crave her company and the intellectual stimulation that comes with it. We find our passion grows deeper with each day. She is away for the next week and for the first time in our triad we are all scattered across the United States. It’s makes the anticipation for our next time together even more unbearable but simultaneously more exciting. We communicate as a triad through texts during the day but also have our individual communication with one another. It makes the passing of time between our long weekends bearable but less than enjoyable. How can two women have serious feelings for one man and yet not feel the jealousy that most people would feel? This is what makes this so erotic and stimulating. Part of it are the looks we receive at parties and dinner and brunch. But so much of this is about the continual transition from sexual partners to lovers to friends. We do count the days between our time with her and know she does the same. Sometimes our texts are raunchy and well beyond suggestive. Other times they’re deep and pensive and insightful. Regardless, we ache between our days with N.